For Hetero Women...

When a man loves a woman, outside the ephemeral romantic heights associated with love, he's either solemnly dutiful or pining for her. They're love too, and those three pretty much cover it. Without at least one, you're probably thinking of something else.

Speculations on why Grigori Perelman rejected the Millennium Prize

a) He doesn't understand economics. The smartest people, in the world, in any one discipline, will often be handicapped in others. One of the two main philosophers who influenced Hitler made this point perhaps best. I know someone well that's no Perelman, but more mathematically advanced than most of the rest of us. Alas, I understand economics better than he, because he's focused conceptually on space-time stuff, flows of electrons, etc. It's not currency. It's not brute mathematical strength, but orientation - a direction turned.

b) Integrity. Like Sartre, he doesn't want to capitulate to the organization giving the prize. Unlike for most of us, accolades negate objectives. Cedeing to the award allows the institution to claim him as object. "Please help us in welcoming Academy Award Winner, Grigori Perelman!" [Perelman enters hammy-smiling, irrespective of mood, offers platitudes to the organization, validating its structure, objectives, and forwards to say what they want to hear about what he's thinking and doing.]

c) Money is demanding. The old truth about one of the primary occupations of the wealthy is preserving wealth is true. The rest of us think it means you can go on holiday at will. You can. But you'll probably spend part of it thinking about your wealth, or will again as soon as you get home.

d) Simply bureaucratic, perhaps accepting the award requires more than just the words "I accept" (I don't know), and he doesn't think whatever efforts are worth the benefit. He may have had to complete a report, sign a contract, etc. "I know how to control the Universe. So tell me — why should I chase a million?" (translated) In addition to the other arguments, the word "chase" sounds like there would be still more work to do for the prize.

e) He's a committed communist. The only use a communist would have for $1 million is a war tool. Otherwise, while potentially useful, it is not in-and-of-itself, and the ideal is that this is the way it should be.

Mom vs. Step-mom

My step-mom is no slouch. Alas, my biological mom is smarter. Nonetheless, mom is comfortable and believes in "systems" - government systems, corporate systems, etc. Step-mom is an entrepreneur.

I give mom ideas that step-mom would run with, while mom thinks if you have a high enough credential and credible experience, you're right for the job.

I'm probably not quite as smart as mom, but step-mom has the edge in that I know she would take some of my bright ideas and consider them seriously.

If only I had mom's skills.

How to Deal with a Loved-one in Trauma

trauma meaning - after a near-death experience (convalescing, in hospital, etc.)





Tier One
Help them. This might not be how you're thinking, but how they're thinking. Or, neither of you may know the answer, and you need outside advice. Some of us have natural intuitions and don't need much outside advice, except in knowing themselves and acknowledging their talents.

Tier Two
You don't really have to 'do' anything, but be a friend. Be normal. Talk and listen to them.

Tier Three
Be an agreeable acquaintance. You can share space, see each other, but interaction is not so important.

Tier Four
Leave them alone.

Anything outside of this hierarchy - coercion, dishonesty, nonsense (saying things that you can't back up or are illogical), antagonism (including arguments) is enemy territory. They're not like normal people. When they need to heal, anything other than peace isn't an option.